Talking about building a tolerance! We as Americans consume tons of coffee and coffee made products daily, but here is a shocker for you - coffee is a drug. Don’t take my word for it, here is something for you from a little site I call Wikipedia – “Caffeine is the world’s most widely consumed psychoactive substance, but unlike many others, it is legal and unregulated in nearly all jurisdictions. In North America, 90% of adults consume caffeine daily”. Did you know that coffee almost got banned in Europe in the 16th century, clergymen pressed for it to be forbidden and labeled Satanic. But Pope Clement VIII took a taste, declared it delicious, and even quipped that it should be baptized. On the strength of this papal blessing, coffeehouses rapidly sprang up throughout Europe. So my question is, ” Is it me, who needs double my caffeine dosage every 48 hours, or just simple inconsistency in Maya Tapas and Grill kitchen which is right in a middle of lovely Lincoln rd?”… You be the judge.
So it is my third morning in a row that I’m visiting Maya for their nice breakfast special: $9.95 for two eggs, French fries, sausage, fruit and off cause coffee (to bless a day with its magic). I am thinking to myself, “It's going to be my favorite place to start a day in paradise, since Van Dike is out-of-business (very sad. I miss you Van Dike restaurant on Lincoln Road)”. Alright, back to me enjoying my beautiful morning, beautiful place, beautiful eggs and the rest of whatever is on a plate, and then boom here it is. In a blink of an eye everything lost its magnificence. What's going on!!? What happened? Who-the-f turned the lights off???? - What happened??? I just took a sip of my COFFEE. It sucks major time. Worst then decaffeinated, watered down, nasty, light brown liquid. I can feel my morning happiness drifting away as a cloud of smoke coming from a table next to mine. My mood changes.
“F” these eggs, “f” these sausages, “f” these fruit and the entire breakfast if coffee isn't right. I don't want brown, tasteless liquid; I need my coffee. I need my fix. I’m grumpy without my coffee uggghhhh.” Junkie!!!!! My mom’s a junkie. My grandma is a 79 year old junkie! We are all junkies! So give me my “crack”. And by the way, that's what those scientists called coffee - a psycho stimulant which works pretty much the same as another psycho stimulant - COCAINE.
So where is my cup of happiness that I paid for. Keep in mind that this is Miami Beach - the home of Cubans and Latinos - the coffee worshipping people. Few moment go by and I get my response back from this waiter and his dancing manager - "It is an American coffee".